DEAR ABBY: My spouse and I’ve scheduled a protracted street journey with one other couple. All 4 of us are retired with a zest to discover. We share frequent pursuits, take pleasure in one another’s firm and intend to share the driving. The catch is, we just lately skilled the erratic driving of the opposite gentleman, and my spouse is understandably unwilling to be within the automobile with him behind the wheel.
Usually an easy-going, good-natured man, he turns into a unique individual behind the wheel. His race-and-brake conduct, darting out and in of visitors, setting the cruise management at 15 to twenty miles per hour over the restrict with a cellphone in hand creates a white-knuckle expertise for the remainder of us, his spouse included. Whereas there’s no street rage, it’s as if beating the navigation’s ETA is a private competitors.
Evidently, his “gun and go” ways take the enjoyment out of what ought to be a leisurely street journey. Furthermore, these antics compromise our security and trigger irregular put on and tear on a car. For the upcoming journey, we’re utilizing my car.
How will we broach our concern with out compromising our friendship? Absent a mutual understanding resulting in a change in his driving habits with us within the automobile, we are going to possible cancel our journey. — WHITE-KNUCKLED IN FLORIDA
DEAR WHITE-KNUCKLED: Your good friend is a harmful driver. For those who method him about his irresponsible habits whereas he’s within the driver’s seat, he will likely be offended. (Belief me.) If the 4 of you go and he isn’t allowed to drive, he’ll wind up sulking within the again seat. (Belief me on that, too.) Your finest resolution, if you wish to preserve a friendship with this couple, could be to cancel the journey. Journey collectively one other time, however do it utilizing one other mode of transportation.
DEAR ABBY: My 15-year-old granddaughter comes from a household of excessive achievers. She has a psychological sickness and has been in remedy since age 5. Remedy has been declined. She has separated from a peer group of high-achieving ladies and moved towards a brand new group of much less educational college students. She additionally has give up taking part in all outdoors actions besides a day part-time job as a result of she desires to avoid wasting for a automobile.
Nothing appears to excite her besides work, and she or he’s happy with mediocre grades, although she says she has excessive ambitions. She tells me she’s glad the way in which she is. One thing appears very unsuitable to me, and I fear for her future. Any recommendation? — PERPLEXED GRANDPOP IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR GRANDPOP: It’s potential your granddaughter wants to alter therapists. It’s additionally potential that her mother and father have chosen to not push her in an educational route she is probably not suited to. From what you’ve got written, she shouldn’t be completely unmotivated. She desires a automobile and is keen to work for it. Good for her! As a result of I’m not accustomed to the household dynamic, that is one thing that ought to be a part of an ongoing dialogue along with her mother and father.
Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
