DEAR ABBY: My husband and I’ve been married 45 years, however during the last six months, we’ve had quite a few fights about Fb. I’m having points along with his dependancy to social media and his fixed posts and feedback with individuals I don’t know.
I get jealous about these interactions with ladies. He has by no means given me motive to not belief him, however I’m having bother with this. It’s additionally an issue when he has one or two alcoholic drinks. If I ask him about one thing FB-related, it generally units him off and we’ve an enormous struggle. He turns into very unreasonable, and it’s at all times my fault. In individual, he’s very pleasant and generally teases ladies. I get jealous about that, too.
We just lately moved to this space and don’t have many buddies, and that appears to be making issues worse. I’m feeling unhappy and lack shallowness proper now. I don’t know tips on how to recover from this. Do you’ve any options? He received’t go to counseling as a result of he says it’s “my downside,” not his. — ALWAYS WRONG IN WEST VIRGINIA
DEAR ALWAYS WRONG: Your husband seems to be a “individuals individual.” Nowhere in your letter did you point out that he has been untrue. It will be mistaken to attempt to change his character since you really feel insecure.
A manner for you (each) to make buddies in a brand new neighborhood could be to contain yourselves in it. Be a part of a membership or a service group, join a fitness center or volunteer to assist others who’re much less lucky. For those who and your husband are spiritual, affiliate with a home of worship. This could facilitate integrating yourselves. Nonetheless, in case your unhappiness and lack of shallowness don’t reduce, then talk about this with a licensed psychological well being skilled.
** ** **
DEAR ABBY: My daughter, “Amelia,” is 26 and has been courting her boyfriend for nearly three years. He’s nice, and my household loves him. He has a son from a earlier relationship who was born whereas my daughter was courting him. (He and the child’s mother broke up whereas she was pregnant.) Amelia is nice with the little boy, however we wish extra for her. We’d like to see the connection go additional, however though he retains telling her it’s going to occur “quickly,” it by no means does.
Amelia has taken on many roles, and I imagine she deserves extra of a dedication from him. She helps to lift his son with nothing in return however empty guarantees. Are my husband and I mistaken for wanting extra for her? She has expressed that she additionally needs the dedication. Ought to we strategy the topic with him? — MAMA WANTS MORE
DEAR MAMA: I don’t suppose it could be smart for you and your husband to strategy Amelia’s boyfriend and attempt to wrest a dedication from him. You do, nonetheless, must air your emotions together with your daughter. She might stay in limbo for years if she doesn’t assert herself. If the romance doesn’t work out, the one who could endure most is that little boy, who could have misplaced one other mom determine.
** ** **
Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
