DEAR ABBY: My husband and I’ve been married 45 years, however during the last six months, we’ve had quite a few fights about Fb. I’m having points together with his habit to social media and his fixed posts and feedback with folks I don’t know.
I get jealous about these interactions with ladies. He has by no means given me cause to not belief him, however I’m having bother with this. It’s additionally an issue when he has one or two alcoholic drinks. If I ask him about one thing FB-related, it generally units him off and we’ve a giant combat. He turns into very unreasonable, and it’s at all times my fault. In particular person, he’s very pleasant and generally teases ladies. I get jealous about that, too.
We lately moved to this space and don’t have many buddies, and that appears to be making issues worse. I’m feeling unhappy and lack shallowness proper now. I don’t know how you can recover from this. Do you could have any strategies? He received’t go to counseling as a result of he says it’s “my downside,” not his. — ALWAYS WRONG IN WEST VIRGINIA
DEAR ALWAYS WRONG: Your husband seems to be a “folks particular person.” Nowhere in your letter did you point out that he has been untrue. It might be incorrect to attempt to change his persona since you really feel insecure.
A manner for you (each) to make buddies in a brand new group can be to contain yourselves in it. Be a part of a membership or a service group, join a gymnasium or volunteer to assist others who’re much less lucky. Should you and your husband are non secular, affiliate with a home of worship. This could facilitate integrating yourselves. Nonetheless, in case your disappointment and lack of shallowness don’t reduce, then focus on this with a licensed psychological well being skilled.
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DEAR ABBY: My daughter, “Amelia,” is 26 and has been relationship her boyfriend for nearly three years. He’s nice, and my household loves him. He has a son from a earlier relationship who was born whereas my daughter was relationship him. (He and the newborn’s mother broke up whereas she was pregnant.) Amelia is nice with the little boy, however we wish extra for her. We’d like to see the connection go additional, however though he retains telling her it’s going to occur “quickly,” it by no means does.
Amelia has taken on many roles, and I consider she deserves extra of a dedication from him. She helps to lift his son with nothing in return however empty guarantees. Are my husband and I incorrect for wanting extra for her? She has expressed that she additionally needs the dedication. Ought to we strategy the topic with him? — MAMA WANTS MORE
DEAR MAMA: I don’t assume it could be sensible for you and your husband to strategy Amelia’s boyfriend and attempt to wrest a dedication from him. You do, nevertheless, must air your emotions together with your daughter. She might stay in limbo for years if she doesn’t assert herself. If the romance doesn’t work out, the one who might undergo most is that little boy, who can have misplaced one other mom determine.
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Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
